Which brings me to the point of this blog. Its a time honored tradition that when you have a birthday, you take treats to school. As a kid I always looked forward to taking the cool treat to school for my birthday. It was in March, so I had most of a school year to plan what I would treat my friends with. Now that my kids are older, I enjoy letting them pick a treat for their friends. For two years of pre-k and one year of kindergarten, P has taken popcorn balls.
We use a delicious recipe involving kettle corn, corn syrup and jello. It makes a tasty treat, for sure, and P and I have a ton of fun making them. This year, however, the school has something else in mind.I quote from a note sent home on the first day of school "Due to health concerns and scheduling, treats and snacks for any occasion must be arranged in advance with the classroom teacher. All treats and snacks must be store bought, in the original packaging in individual servings. No homemade treats or snacks are allowed at school. Treats and snacks may not require refrigeration and must have a clearly printed list of ingredients on the original packaging. We strongly encourage you to select a treat or snack with nutritional value, such as fresh fruits and vegetables."
Let me break this down for you:
"Due to health concerns and scheduling, treats and snacks for any occasion must be arranged in advance with the classroom teacher." Are there really parents who DON'T do this? No offense, but what parent would pack their child's bag with 27 cupcakes, without asking the teacher in advance. Just let little Joey show up all like "Surprise, my birthday is this weekend, and now you have 27 kids hyped up on cupcakes during the math lesson." The fact that the school has to advise people of this just shows the dumbing down of America, folks. I retract my previous "no offense" statement.
"...All treats and snacks must be store bought, in the original packaging in individual servings. No homemade treats or snacks are allowed at school. Treats and snacks may not require refrigeration and must have a clearly printed list of ingredients on the original packaging." Whoa, whoa, whoa. So now I cannot make my popcorn balls (which really is ok, because its very time consuming and my fingers turn pink from the jello), but I cannot order 3 dozen cookies from a bakery either. This birthday, its turning kinda lame. Like the kid who always brought everyone a pencil and stickers for their treat. I do understand wanting the ingredients because children are allergic to stuff. My brother in law just found out he is allergic to peanuts. Highly allergic. How did he make it through his 32 years not knowing this or dying during treat day at school? And an unfortunate truth is that there are a lot of creepers in the world who could spike those homemade treats with Windex. But now they have to be packed in individual servings? Each family has to provide a bottle of hand sanitizer as a school supply, so clearly this cannot be due to germs. Can it? Really?
"...We strongly encourage you to select a treat or snack with nutritional value, such as fresh fruits and vegetables." So we have just officially made every child lamer than the pencil kid. Pencils are becoming the new cool. I'm sorry, call me old fashioned, or call me irresponsible, but isn't the key word in birthday treat treat? I can see a class of first graders now:Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Joey, happy birthday to you! Now blow out the fake candles on your individually packaged carrots and celery! That's wilted and warm, because treats can't require refrigeration. Yaaaa...
I understand that there is a problem with obesity in America. I'm a fan of Jamie Oliver, I abhor school lunches because they're poorly executed and lack the nutritional value they encourage families to support with their new "treat" rule, but in moderation, a cookie isn't going to hurt anyone. Whether it's been touched by another kid or not. Personally, I think P will be the pencil kid this year. At least she stands a chance, a Smurf pencil with some matching stickers will be a hit. And maybe, we will throw in some individually wrapped Snickers bars. Sorry, we have our cake, and eat it too. Happy Birthday, girls!
